There aren't a whole lot of folks like Kinky Friedman. He's, above all else, an independent thinker. A mystery novelist (he'd be the first to hold the governor's mansion, if elected), friend to everyone from Willie to Laura Bush, he is also a self-proclaimed Jewish Cowboy, maybe the only one around these parts. Author, Musician, and candidate for Governor of Texas, Kinky Friedman served as a Peace Corps Volunteer in Malaysia in the 1960's.
Kinky Friedman may just be the next governor of Texas
Meet Kinky ... (He may just be your next governor)
08/07/2005
Meet Kinky (He may just be your next governor)
Advertisement
There aren't a whole lot of folks like Kinky Friedman. He's, above all else, an independent thinker. A mystery novelist (he'd be the first to hold the governor's mansion, if elected), friend to everyone from Willie to Laura Bush, he is also a self-proclaimed Jewish Cowboy, maybe the only one around these parts.
He is serious about his run for Texas governor in 2006. What started out as a wild idea has evolved into an all out effort, even if his name can't even appear on the ballot until he amasses 45,000 signatures and he can't even begin collecting them until after the primaries in May of next year. But Kinky has hired the same machine that helped propel WWF champeen Jesse Ventura into the state house in Minnesota. And when you do that, you're definitely bound for somewhere.
And so now, it's smackdown time in Texas.
Kinky and Online News Editor Jimmy Patterson sat down for a chat last week. Kinky's got some interesting ideas. Some of them might just work. Others may be crazy enough to work. Whatever ... we're in for a ride if Kinky, whose campaign slogan is "Why the Hell Not?" enters into the race against the big money politicos.
MyWestTexas.com: I know you're serious about your run for governor. But how do you get the 45,000 people you'll need to sign a petition for you to be on the ballot to take you seriously?
Kinky: I think most Texans have now come to the conclusion that this campaign is not the joke like the joke that is the govenrnor and the Texas Legislature. They're doing their best work for me right now.
MyWestTexas.com: Any idea of how to fix the school finance issue?
Kinky: Three basic ideas ... The first is called the Trust For Texas Heroes, which is taking a one-percent charge at wellhead from big corportate oil -- not the little fellers, the Rockefellers -- and all the big corporations in Texas that aren't paying now. We take that one percent, put it in a trust, and not let it go in lobbyists' pockets like the lottery money has; but it would go to Texas heroes: our teachers, cops and firefighers. Secondly, transfer all sports funding out of education, and let corporate funding bid for all high school sports -- ads, stadiums, uniforms, concessions, everything. It's been done in Georgia for the past three eyars and it's apparently working there but our legislature hasn't approached Georgia to see how well it's worked. Third, Slots for Tots, bring in legalized casino gambling. Have video poker in bars, and casino gambling. Let's at least let the taxpayers decide if this would be a solution.
MyWestTexas.com: Anything else?
Kinky: Get rid of the TAKS test and put the only people in charge of the classroom who have actually ever seen the inside of the classroom: put teachers back in charge. For the first time ever, Texas has finally slipped below Mississippi in classroom performance.
MyWestTexas.com: What is the Texas Peace Corps?
Kinky: The Texas Peace Corps will create an in-state volunteer agency, modeled after the Peace Corps, to promote the arts and life skills in our schools. Musicians and artists, along with retired teachers, business executives, and police, will join us in teaching our kids how to act, play music, paint, write a check, keep accounts, and stay out of trouble. I would ask some of my friends, like Laura Bush, Willie, Richard 'Racehorse' Haynes, and former UT Coach Darrell Royal, to lead this effort.
MyWestTexas.com: What other problems do we have that you can fix?
Kinky: One of our biggest problems is that Texas elected officials are so out of touch with the working people in Texas. The border is a problem and the Five Mexican Generals idea is a pretty good one. Mexico is not a poor country it's an OPEC country, (Former President Carlos) Salinas retired to Switzerland with $32 billion. They have a corrupt government so people come over here and we feed them and take care of them all for free. I'm here to tell PEMEX we're a few quarts low and it's time to play hard ball.
MyWestTexas.com: What is the Five Mexican Generals plan?
Kinky: It was the idea of my friend Joaquin Jackson, a former Texas Ranger. We would divide the border into five jurisdictions, assign each jurisdiction to a Mexican general and then put $2 million into bank accounts that we would control, one account for each general. Then, each time we catch an illegal crossing through a general's jurisdiction we take out $5,000 from that general's account. That'll solve the problem, and the Hispanic activists I've talked to say it's crazy enough that it just might work."
MyWestTexas.com: What about our criminal justice system?
Kinky: We have more people in Texas living in prisons than live free in either Vermont or Alaska. Sixty percent of those prisoners are non-violent, and many of them could be in treatment centers. Meanwhile, every neighborhood knows of a sexual predator that's out there in their neighborhood, and those are the ones we should put in prison and throw away the key. Drug users are not the threat that predators are. If I find you with a marijuana stash, you're going to prison, but that's not necessarily the case with predators. All of this is just common sense.
MyWestTexas.com: Is Texas ready for an independent to run the state?
Kinky: Every Texan is an independent, so why are we letting all thes empty suits and empty dresses tell us what to do? The last independent we had serve in Austin was Sam Houston in 1859.
MyWestTexas.com: You're not a real admirer of the politicians we have doing the state's work in Austin now are you?
Kinky: Their main job is holding on to power. The only time they get off their (butts) is when they attack each other. All I'm doing is giving the people somebody to vote for and not against.
---
In Part 2 of our conversation Wednesday, Kinky kicks back, takes his boots off, flicks the ashes off the end of his expensive Cubans and has some fun. And he also tells us why he thinks Karl Rove won't try to step in and keep him from the state house.
