Even a skeptic has to admit that Kinky Friedman's I-want-to-be-the-next-governor-of Texas stand-up is pretty funny



Friedman, the musician, writer and deliberately outlandish character, brought his drive to get on the November gubernatorial ballot to Fort Worth on Tuesday, drawing more than 300 lawyers, judges and assorted other business-clad inquirers to the Tarrant County Bar Association's monthly luncheon. Author, Musician, and candidate for Governor of Texas, Kinky Friedman served as a Peace Corps Volunteer in Malaysia in the 1960's.

Even a skeptic has to admit that Kinky Friedman's I-want-to-be-the-next-governor-of Texas stand-up is pretty funny

Take my governor -- please
By LINDA P. CAMPBELL
Star-Telegram Staff Writer

Even a skeptic has to admit that Kinky Friedman's I-want-to-be-the-next-governor-of Texas stand-up is pretty funny.

He draws chuckles even with many of his shop-worn riffs and the forced quips that he has to veer across the front lawn and through the flower beds to deliver.

"I'm not a politician at all," he says. "I've not even been indicted yet."

Gays "have every right to be just as miserable as the rest of us."

"Musicians can better run this state than politicians. I've said beauticians can better run this state than politicians."

"You can lead a politician to water, but you can't make him think."

"Every time a bell rings, another lobbyist gets his wings."

He says he wants to ensure that "no teacher is left behind, and in order to accomplish this, I say we need to leave one governor behind."

Friedman, the musician, writer and deliberately outlandish character, brought his drive to get on the November gubernatorial ballot to Fort Worth on Tuesday, drawing more than 300 lawyers, judges and assorted other business-clad inquirers to the Tarrant County Bar Association's monthly luncheon.

Attendees ran the gamut from Republican elected officials, such as Court of Appeals Justice Bob McCoy and District Attorney Tim Curry, to Democrat Dan Barrett, who's running against incumbent Anna Mowery for a seat in the Texas House.

This was decidedly not your standard bar luncheon. For one thing, good attendance typically runs about 150, said Joe Shannon, a former bar president who invited Friedman some time after serendipitously happening upon him in a Kerrville bookstore back in December.

And then there was Shannon's thank-you-for-coming gift to Friedman: a six-pack of bottled Guinness.

It was a not-veiled-in-the-least reference to Dallas Morning News photos showing Friedman with an open beer while riding in a St. Patrick's Day parade Saturday, a no-no under Texas' open container law.

"I admit to drinking it, but I did not swallow," Friedman said. And the show was on.

Friedman touted himself as the only candidate in the race "who believes in gay marriage and prayer in schools." (laughter)

He said that "being governor is like being the judge of a big chili cookoff. This is not a hard thing." (hearty laughter)

"Wrestling is real. Politics is fixed." (applause)

Referring to Republicans and Democrats as dictatorial "Crips and Bloods" that stifle outside voices, he said, "It shouldn't be government of the money, for the money and by the money."

Friedman needs to collect more than 45,500 signatures in less than two months to make the ballot as an independent. Gov. Rick Perry is the GOP nominee, and former U.S. Rep. Chris Bell is the Democratic candidate. State Comptroller Carole Keeton Strayhorn also is trying to get on as an independent.

Friedman predicted that "by November, the soul of Texas will be riding on this campaign."

But heaven help us if that's true.

Here's a candidate who claims that "the education system is just dreadful," that the state must "get away from teaching to the test."

But then he hyperbolizes that schoolkids believe the Civil War took place in Europe, that they haven't a clue who Mark Twain was. He tells a questioner that he'll support standardized testing, just not the Texas Assessment of Knowledge and Skills.

He advocates more use of biodiesel fuels but offers a preposterous scheme that he calls his "five Mexican generals plan." Don't even ask.

In one breath, he says that "there should be more spirituality in schools."

In another, he jokes about his buddy Willie Nelson "smoking a joint the size of a large kosher salami."

That supposedly occurred when he and Nelson were arguing over the invasion of Iraq, which Nelson opposed and Friedman initially supported.

"I said, 'Look, Willie, the guy is a tyrannical bully, and we've got to take him out.' And Willie says, 'No, he's our president, and we've got to stand by him.'"

It's hilarious, true or not. But do we want a governor who's largely good for a laugh just because the current one has done so much to make us weep in anger and frustration?

Yet the man in the black cowboy hat with the ever-present cigar represents an alternative, and he's energizing a race that needs to be on every voter's radar screen. And darned if some of what Friedman says doesn't make sense.

"I'm not against Rick Perry. It's Kinky Friedman against apathy," he said. "I just can't believe that the heroes of the Alamo died in hopes that there'd be small turnout."

He said that "there's one thing the governor has to do, inspire the people of Texas, and inspire them in the right way."

Friedman, who's 61, said that he's trying to appeal to younger generations.

"I tell kids to remember that Martin Luther King is not a street, and John F. Kennedy is not an airport," he said. "Maybe they dreamed a little bit bigger, and maybe they dreamed a little bit kinder."

And it doesn't sound like a joke when Friedman remakes JFK's famous challenge this way: "Ask not if you're proud of Texas. Ask if you've made Texas proud of you."

Our current governor fails that test. And some of us aren't the least bit amused.
Linda P. Campbell is a Star-Telegram editorial writer. (817) 390-7867 lcampbell@star-telegram.com

When this story was posted in March 2006, this was on the front page of PCOL:




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Peace Corps suspends program in Bangladesh Peace Corps Director Gaddi H. Vasquez announced the suspension of the Peace Corps program in Bangladesh on March 15. The safety and security of volunteers is the number one priority of the Peace Corps. Therefore, all Peace Corps volunteers serving in Bangladesh have safely left the country. More than 280 Peace Corps volunteers have served in Bangladesh since the program opened in November 1998. Latest: What other newspapers say.

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Invitee re-assigned after inflammatory remarks The Peace Corps has pulled the invitation to Derek Volkart to join the Morocco Training Program and offered him a position in the Pacific instead after officials read an article in which he stated that his decision to join the Peace Corps was in "response to our current fascist government." RPCV Lew Nash says that "If Derek Volkart spoke his mind as freely in Morocco about the Moroccan monarchy it could cause major problems for himself and other Peace Corps volunteers." Latest: The Ashland Daily Tidings has issued a request for all Peace Corps communications on the case.

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Re-envision Peace Corps Nicholas J. Slabbert says in his article in the Harvard International Review that an imaginatively reinvented Peace Corps could powerfully promote US interests in a period when perceptions of American motives are increasingly relevant to global realignment. His study envisions a new role for the Peace Corps in five linked areas: (1) reinventing America's international profile via a new use of soft power; (2) moving from a war-defined, non-technological, reactive theory of peace to a theory of peace as a normal, proactive component of technologically advanced democracy; (3) reappraising Peace Corps as a national strategic asset whose value remains largely untapped; (4) Peace Corps as a model for the technological reinvention of government agencies for the 21st century; (5) redefining civil society as information technology society. Read the article and leave your comments.

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March 1, 1961: Keeping Kennedy's Promise On March 1, 1961, President John F. Kennedy issues Executive Order #10924, establishing the Peace Corps as a new agency: "Life in the Peace Corps will not be easy. There will be no salary and allowances will be at a level sufficient only to maintain health and meet basic needs. Men and women will be expected to work and live alongside the nationals of the country in which they are stationed--doing the same work, eating the same food, talking the same language. But if the life will not be easy, it will be rich and satisfying. For every young American who participates in the Peace Corps--who works in a foreign land--will know that he or she is sharing in the great common task of bringing to man that decent way of life which is the foundation of freedom and a condition of peace. "

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Top Stories: February 2, 2006 Al Kamen writes: Rice to redeploy diplomats 20 Jan Peace Corps mourns the Loss of Volunteer Tessa Horan 1 Feb RPCV pursues dreams in America's Heartland 1 Feb Sargent Shriver documentary to be shown in LA 30 Jan W. Frank Fountain is new board chairman of Africare 27 Jan Abbey Brown writes about acid attacks in Bangladesh 26 Jan Christopher Hill Sees Ray of Hope in N.Korea Standoff 26 Jan Jeffrey Smit writes on one man diplomatic outposts 25 Jan Joe Blatchford's ACCION and microfinance 24 Jan James Rupert writes: A calculated risk in Pakistan 23 Jan Sam Farr rips conservative immigration bill 21 Jan Americans campaign for PC to return to Sierra Leone 20 Jan Kinky Friedman supports Gay Marriage 20 Jan Margaret Krome writes on Women leaders 18 Jan James Walsh leads bipartisan US delegation to Ireland 17 Jan Mark Schneider writes on Elections and Beyond in Haiti 16 Jan Robert Blackwill on a "serious setback" in US-India relations 13 Jan Kevin Quigley writes on PC and U.S. Image Abroad 13 Jan Emily Metzloff rides bicycle 3,100 miles from Honduras 9 Jan Charles Brennick starts operation InterConnection 9 Jan Lee Fisher tells story of Pablo Morillo 7 Jan Nancy Wallace writes: Was PC a CIA front after all? 4 Jan

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Paid Vacations in the Third World? Retired diplomat Peter Rice has written a letter to the Wall Street Journal stating that Peace Corps "is really just a U.S. government program for paid vacations in the Third World." Director Vasquez has responded that "the small stipend volunteers receive during their two years of service is more than returned in the understanding fostered in communities throughout the world and here at home." What do RPCVs think?

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RPCV admits to abuse while in Peace Corps Timothy Ronald Obert has pleaded guilty to sexually abusing a minor in Costa Rica while serving there as a Peace Corps volunteer. "The Peace Corps has a zero tolerance policy for misconduct that violates the law or standards of conduct established by the Peace Corps," said Peace Corps Director Gaddi H. Vasquez. Could inadequate screening have been partly to blame? Mr. Obert's resume, which he had submitted to the Peace Corps in support of his application to become a Peace Corps Volunteer, showed that he had repeatedly sought and obtained positions working with underprivileged children. Read what RPCVs have to say about this case.

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Military Option sparks concerns The U.S. military, struggling to fill its voluntary ranks, is allowing recruits to meet part of their reserve military obligations after active duty by serving in the Peace Corps. Read why there is opposition to the program among RPCVs. Director Vasquez says the agency has a long history of accepting qualified applicants who are in inactive military status. John Coyne says "Not only no, but hell no!" and RPCV Chris Matthews leads the debate on "Hardball." Avi Spiegel says Peace Corps is not the place for soldiers while Coleman McCarthy says to Welcome Soldiers to the Peace Corps. Read our poll results. Latest: Congress passed a bill on December 22 including language to remove Peace Corps from the National Call to Service (NCS) military recruitment program

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Why blurring the lines puts PCVs in danger When the National Call to Service legislation was amended to include Peace Corps in December of 2002, this country had not yet invaded Iraq and was not in prolonged military engagement in the Middle East, as it is now. Read the story of how one volunteer spent three years in captivity from 1976 to 1980 as the hostage of a insurrection group in Colombia in Joanne Marie Roll's op-ed on why this legislation may put soldier/PCVs in the same kind of danger. Latest: Read the ongoing dialog on the subject.

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Friends of the Peace Corps 170,000 strong 170,000 is a very special number for the RPCV community - it's the number of Volunteers who have served in the Peace Corps since 1961. It's also a number that is very special to us because March is the first month since our founding in January, 2001 that our readership has exceeded 170,000. And while we know that not everyone who comes to this site is an RPCV, they are all "Friends of the Peace Corps." Thanks everybody for making PCOL your source of news for the Returned Volunteer community.

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