I've decided not to take the PC's offer of Interruption of Service. They offered it to all the volunteers here. Basically it is a chance to go home early due to "circumstances beyond your control." You get to leave without having to Early Terminate, and still get the benefits of being a RPCV. (Returned PC Volunteer) If things change, and get more violent, or unsafe, then of course, I'll come home. So, don't worry. But right now, I feel safe and with the exception of saying goodbye to people a year earlier than I had planned, I am okay. I'm not being flippant, or not caring about my safety, I just feel like this is still where I am meant to be. I made it this far, and as Daddy reminded me a few months ago, God doesn't give you more than you can handle.
Peace Corps Volunteer "the next step " writes: Basically the only additional thing I can add to what you've read or heard is that I'm safe. Most of the violence was restricted to the south, and the north remains peaceful.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
My Peace Corps Experience: Chapter Two
You might have been remarking that things have been quiet on the blogging front for a while now, and you'd be right. I just haven't really been up to it recently. Unless you've been hiding in a cave, or haven't seen any news program in the past few weeks, you'll know that the situation in Kyrgyzstan has been pretty tense. I'm not really allowed to talk about it and I don't really know any more than you would if you read the news. Basically the only additional thing I can add to what you've read or heard is that I'm safe. Most of the violence was restricted to the south, and the north remains peaceful. The past few weeks have been really, really tough for all the volunteers- almost as bad, if not worse than the two months of my personal "dark ages." I'm handling everything better this go around, but it is more difficult because, due to the recent violence, most of the volunteers in the south are leaving the country and a few volunteers from other oblasts, too.
Among the volunteers that are leaving are almost ALL of my best friends over here. Plus, K16s, who were supposed to leave in August, are leaving now, too. I've been blessed for so long with so many wonderful friends, and all of you back home are so important to me, but serving in the Peace Corps with my friends over here has been such a wonderful experience and has allowed us to become as close within a year as I am with some of you back home who I've known for years. There are just things that they will understand that I couldn't ask you all to. So, saying goodbye to them has forced me to star in an encore performance of my role as human watering hose. Haha. I also realized, that I've never been left before. I've moved so often, and took off for this great PC Adventure, and left my friends and family behind. I have never known what it feels like to be the one that gets left behind. And truthfully, it sucks. After many discussions and intense internal battles,
I've decided not to take the PC's offer of Interruption of Service. They offered it to all the volunteers here. Basically it is a chance to go home early due to "circumstances beyond your control." You get to leave without having to Early Terminate, and still get the benefits of being a RPCV. (Returned PC Volunteer) If things change, and get more violent, or unsafe, then of course, I'll come home. So, don't worry. But right now, I feel safe and with the exception of saying goodbye to people a year earlier than I had planned, I am okay. I'm not being flippant, or not caring about my safety, I just feel like this is still where I am meant to be. I made it this far, and as Daddy reminded me a few months ago, God doesn't give you more than you can handle.
At the time, I thought God was overestimating my abilities, but… I don't know, maybe it is not rational, and at times I feel that it is against my better judgment, but I am staying. I can't explain why really, but trust me, I'll be okay. So, right now I'm packing to come home FOR A VISIT. I think a month at home will give me an opportunity to clear my head and to prepare for my last year in country. Coming over here for the first time was hard because I: 1) didn't know anyone 2)didn't know the language 3)didn't know the culture 4)didn't know my job 5)had never been away from home for so long. After almost month of vacation I can come back with a lot less trepidation than the first time. I am just going to have to make a concentrated effort on making friends with the new group of volunteers and strengthening friendship with people in my group that I don't know as well. The next year, without my in-country support network that got me through the first year, will be hard but I have faith that I can deal with it. It'll be my Chapter Two. For now, I'm hoping and praying that Kyrgyzstan will be peaceful and stable and can recover from the tumultuous past few months. I know it will take a lot of work and time, but I think it is doable. Here's to hoping. Miss you Love from Kyrgyzstan (for the next 8 days) Jess
